honestythe only thing i can really say in favor of my work is that i try to beabsolutely honest. this doesn't mean things aren't hidden; there arethings i curse myself for daily, hourly, that remain in the dark, that itry to subvert, repress, rescind. but what is said is the truth as i findit, which of course is no truth at all. i am a brilliant musician forexample by virtue of being a fraud; i am a selfish friend and loverperhaps, always on the mend, emending, making amends. i believe others maybe the same, feel the same, scratch away at similar surfaces; for example,celine was braver than i, perhaps vile to a greater degree. i know where istand; like other deluded people, perhaps, if i am so, i revel in my mind,in the dismal horizon of future discovery which will never come, butalways seems just within reach. if at this point i am a menace to others,